Coming this March, I’ll be in Langkawi. A trial period of living for a month in my own kampung in anticipation of me moving back there for good. I want to see ever if the sleepy Langkawi will be a sanctuary or a torment. I am nervous by just thinking about it. Am a creature comfort who enjoys watching astro, movies at the cinemas, sipping lattes at the Starbucks, torture myself at gym but the most importantly I like the comfort of being indoor. Langkawi is lacking all of these.
It would be lying if I don’t feel unease of moving back but I am almost….yeah, almost certain that the decision to return will ultimately be rewarded but unsure on how to get it done right. The ripening age is certainly one of the factors that I think I should be somewhere peaceful, slow pace of life and most importantly I want to spend more time with my aging parents.
Sure I still enjoying by the many facets of living in the big city here in Kuala Lumpur, the flying career that has taken me places and exposed me to the varieties of luxurious things and living, met interesting people, thousand of co-workers, uncounted number of beds in hotels that I had slept in and don’t forget the shenanigans in foreign countries, ups and downs for being a seasoned air crew. I still love my job but the money is no longer attractive. It is time to move on. I know I will briefly regret the decision to hang my uniform but it is for the best I guess. I have become bitter with the company I work with and I think it is becoming unhealthy for both myself and the employer if I continue working under duress like this.
I will miss those pretty stewardesses and good-looking stewards, will sure yearn gossiping with my friends at the hotels, bickered one another and truly am going to miss the whole mess that am now complaining about flying.
I had terminated my gym membership with the Fitness first and keep telling people that am going to resign. Truthfully, I had done all these because I want to be sure of resigning…I want people especially my colleagues to know that am leaving so they would ask that question ” when, why” again and again. I want to be reminded that I truly wanted to resign. Now, writing it down here in my blog is to reinforce the desire to leave this company. I need to reinvent myself. I am nearing 40 and looking at the limited zeros in my account is truly disappointing. I should at least have a five digits saving by now but nada.
The humid and hot Langkawi is going to be very challenging. The laid back life style going to be quite confronting too. I pray that Allah has mercy on me. Huhuhu